Saturday, January 9, 2010

I'm tired of being a tug boat.

I really hate complaining, especially on my blog. A passage I read a few weeks ago has been weighing on me for awhile, and I'm trying, I really am! But I am just. plain. tired. I'm tired of a lot of things today. I'm tired of 'low' carbs. I'm tired of closing other people's snacks so they don't get stale. I'm tired of reading directions so other people don't have to. I'm tired of still being in school. I'm tired of working 3 jobs, and only getting paid for one. I'm tired of being everyone's tug boat.

Do you know what a tug boat does? I don't really either.

Except I saw one once, it pulled a massive luxury cruise ship away from a dock I was standing on. Something small... something no one thinks about or remembers even exists... something used to get the rich, luxurious cruise ship back on track.... no thank yous screaming from the deck to that boat... just expected to work when it is its time and it does... it pulls and pulls that massive ship away from the dock so all the cruisers can get back going to the islands and get back to their party. What does a tug boat do when it isn't pulling the cruise ship?

Anyways, I feel like a tug boat. I feel like I'm pulling and pulling and sometimes I need the cruise ship to turn on its dang motor and help me out!!!!! But then I remember that I asked. I asked to be a servant. In fact, I'm pretty sure I ask at least 3 or 4 times a day to be a servant, and maybe this is it! So if God is just answering my prayers.... Why am I so tired?? Which brings me back to why I hate complaining, especially on my blog.

Let me try again.... I am so thankful it is just Saturday. I am thankful I am in school. I am thankful I have church tomorrow. I am so thankful I have DVR and can skip that awful vampire farming humans movie trailer, ick! I am thankful the Biggest Loser started back this week. I am so thankful for the 'blog friends' I have encountered lately (can you just encounter a friend?). I am thankful to have heat.

Most of all, I am thankful that Jesus died on a cross so my soul could be saved. I am. so thankful.

Philippians 2:14-16

14Do everything without complaining or arguing, 15so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a crooked and depraved generation, in which you shine like stars in the universe 16as you hold out the word of life—in order that I may boast on the day of Christ that I did not run or labor for nothing.

4 comments:

  1. Such an AMAZING post. Really. Flat out amazing. Thank you! I needed a reminder to be thankful today, and I am so thankful I "met" you!

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  2. yes, this was a great post! but i will pray for your strength!!

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  3. It's so easy to get overwhelmed on this earthly journey. Sounds like you need some "me time." Hope it gets better!

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  4. oh little tug boat, i feel your pain. at least you have vented, and a ticket to a luxury cruiser in your life should pop up soon!

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